We all have come across them, grouchy gamers ever-ready to hurl their baseless lame excuses for when once again they get their ass kicked with their confidence crushed to pieces. We’ve compiled a list of excuses which gamers give when they suck at video Games, read on and don’t forget to share with us any lame excuse which you have come across.
This Game Sucks.
Yes, of course it does. That’s why you’re playing it. You had a quick look through your collection, discarded all the great games and chose the game that sucks to play. Yet again we have the solution for you, PLAY A DIFFERENT GAME!!!
Lag…Holy Lag
When gamers complain that lag is effecting their game, they’re actually referring to latency. If despite their geekage they are messing up on something as basic as this it’s no wonder they’re incapable of walking from A to B without getting shot off by some 14 year old gamer.
If you hear someone complaining about lag, out-geek them by enquiring “you mean ‘latency’, actually”.
Age…Arghh my reflexes
Another fact of life which gamers out there can’t ignore “As you get older, you slow down”. This is a physiological fact determined by a multitude of factors, including the speed of neurological transmission from neuron to neuron, the properties of chemicals within neurotransmitters, and the length of your nostril hairs. 🙂
If you must use age as an excuse, exaggerate it. Say If you’re 14, say you are in fact 5. If you’re 40, say you’re 90. Preferably, find a better excuse, this one’s lamer than the ants in my old ant-farm. (No mum, the legs just fell off, honest!)